Depression isn't just crying
Or locking yourself in your room and never leaving.
Depression is self harm. Breakdowns, matted hair, wet eyes all the time.
The only way you still feel alive is by pain. You cut and hurt yourself to make sure you're alive.
You never brush your teeth or comb your hair. You don't eat, you throw up.
You never feel confident, you hide yourself as much as you can. Wear whatever hides the most.
You don't talk to people anymore, you don't just sleep because you want to get away from the world, you sleep because you don't want to live. But yet, we still live so we don't hurt the ones that care. We put on our best smiles to seem happy, and they believe the lies. But they don't see the tears in your eyes or they don't understand why you wear big clothing. They think you're happy, but they think you being sad is just a phase to get attention. They don't know. But i do.
I see people's pain, or fake smiles, because i do the same. I hide my sadness and act the best i can. But i try to please others. I've started to actually feel happy recently. So keep pushing through. Things do get better, i know that sounds cliche but it's true. Everything will get better