I can't write

I can't well if I try to or not

I basically am what you call a writers block

Myself entirely has redifined the definition of poetry because I now just find myself ranting

But you called my work beautiful

Just like you called my yellow teeth, crooked smile, split ends, stretch marks and scars, beautiful

I never told you but I looked up to you

I strived to see thet better in people

But instead I focus on everyones flaws

I take them and expand them so that's all that they are

I do this often

I do this to myself

But every time I did you'd make the argument that taking my own or someone else's confidence and turning it into nothingness is not okay

But when have I ever listened

I can't do that well either

I really tried to but it is so difficult to hear you calling me astounishing when the only thing I was told as a little girl is that I'd never be

You changed that

You had told me the stars lived to shine for me

That the universe should be thankful to have me

You told me day after day that you loved me, and I believed you

I listened as every word rolled off your lips like you were some kind of angel

You made me feel like I was the oxygen the world needed to survive

You spoke and laughed like a metaphor that I've been trying to describe for years now

You loved me when I least deserved it because that's when you knew I really needed it

And when I was younger I was constantly reminded of how some boys will grow up learning how to break my hear

But no one ever warned me about the bestfriend, the other half,

About the person I thought would one day help me plan my own wedding

You by yourself decided to rip me out of your life using the actual bff necklace you gave to me as a gift

And your reason why, was detailed with a massive letter count of 7

You replaced our friendship of three years in less than seven days using 7 letters to make up the word "because"

I still have so many questions because of this

I have so many questions because of your because

I lost the "trying to sleep at night " battle to "staying awake in tears" because of you

I struggled to maintain other friendships because of you

I could've been enjoying this precious life but instead, because of you, I was the metal being tied down by my magnetic bed and dark room

Because of you there are now thousands of bff necklaces tangled up and locked around my heart and I can't get them off

I'd like to think that you don't affect me anymore, that we're both happy and going our own ways

But when I see the car that used to drive us to the movies on the road, I still have to check if it's you

Or still, whenever someone asks me about my friendships, you still come to mind

You had left our friendship on read.

So dear parents with daughters,

Or just if you have children in general,

Even if there's one soon to be or on the way,

Please listen and listen to me closely

I have never? been hurt by a boy like I have by a friend

Be more worried when they come home at night to tell you that they're in a fight with their bestfriend rather their boyfriend or girlfriend

Don't ever let them label themselves unworthy or unwanted just because someone can't see what a miraculous person they truly are

Be there for them, they need you the most

Make it so that they can't have a better bestfriend, than you.