My heady  pounded,
Ears ringing.
My body felt like it was
Made of paper,
My bones
Made of lead.
         Wake up
I groaned inwardly.
Why?
Why now?
Please...No.
Now
Tears brim my eyes
As my legs move on their own.
No
No
NO!
You know what you have to do
I begged, pleaded.
But my body was
Moving on its own.
One step in front of another.
Give me controle
Though I fought,
There is no hope.
It is now as if
My mind and body are
Disconnected.
     Don’t fight me
If I could speak,
I would scream.
It was as if I were watching a
Horror film.
     Love me
Worthless.
My legs moved faster
The cloth of my jeans
Scraping past each other with
Every step.
     Feed me
My legs stopped as
An old man stepped
In front of me
Smiling,
Laughing
     Kill him
Now the tears were falling
My arms,
My legs,
Acting on their own accord
Arms  reached out, knife
Lunging towards him
     Do it!
His eyes turned to me in
Surprise,
Then turned to fear as
I reached him.
I hoped he could see the
Regret in mine.
    I’m sorry