Of course I knew it was poison
What else could it have been?
The witch's wig was so unconvincing
Her wart was falling off her skin
Her makeup was cakey and
Pastey but still I let her in
You see I was ready to end it all
With just one bite
Of that apple skin

I was homeless
And an orphan
Schizophrenic too
The trees had eyes
The animals talked
What was I to do?
From princessing to maid for hire
I was babysitting 7 brats
I even them cruel nicknames
But they were kind off into that

And before this
I was harassed by this guy
I barely even knew
They called him Charming
But I think he had a fetish
For stealing women's shoes

But you're pretty
-Well actually no
I'm just a little better than average
Which is pretty normal
When normal has a diet of gruel and cabbage
So I'm Land Far Far Away 10
But really an LA 5
And that's the reason
My stepmother wants my life

So when she finally came
With her offering of food
I ate it
And I waited
For The End to be absolute

Or at least it was supposed to be
Now I'm queen
That's the last time I trust a fruit