Except

June 29, 2015
By AvengeMyBrokenSong GOLD, WHOOP, New York
AvengeMyBrokenSong GOLD, WHOOP, New York
18 articles 0 photos 83 comments

Favorite Quote:
"It takes more strength to cry at mid-defeat."
-Susan Boyle
"The closer you get to the light, the bigger your shadow becomes."
-Kingdom Hearts


Loving arms last forever
     Except when they don’t…
We’ll always stay together
     Except when you won’t…

Our love is a river
That never runs dry
     Except when we wither
     And aridly die.
Our faith is the wind
That boosts us high
     Except when we spiral
     Down from the sky.

To stay with you
Is my only goal
     Except when you break
     This young heart you stole.
I like to think life is mine alone,
That I have grasped it, EXCEPT
     You’re gone, nowhere to be found
     So vicious tears I’ve wept.



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This article has 4 comments.


on Aug. 16 2015 at 5:01 pm
PoeticAtheist SILVER, Durham, North Carolina
7 articles 7 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I go to seek a great perhaps."

I love your work, but you seem to have a recurring problem with creating a beautiful rhythm and then breaking it at the end. All in all, amazing work

on Jul. 21 2015 at 7:15 pm
SomeoneMagical PLATINUM, Durham, New Hampshire
22 articles 1 photo 260 comments
I like the repetition piece of it and it's amazing. Keep up the good work.

on Jul. 21 2015 at 3:20 pm
ThePoeticJustice PLATINUM, Houston, Texas
29 articles 0 photos 207 comments

Favorite Quote:
Hold fast and keep your head up high for life will pass right by you like a speeding bird if you don't acknowledge it- Charles Moorer III (me)

before I say anything else, I just gotta tell ya how strong a beginning it has.It's like you've tried your hardest to keep the frustration, but they push harder, well put and well said, and like your other pieces, it's simply magnificent

Hanban12 ELITE said...
on Jul. 20 2015 at 5:59 pm
Hanban12 ELITE, Lake Worth, Florida
133 articles 7 photos 633 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them."
Henry David Thoreau

"I fell in love the way you fall asleep; slowly, and then all at once."
John Green

Beautiful, love the structure and flow of this poem. My only suggestion would be that you don't need to capitalize the last "except," since, in my opinion, it flows even better just by itself. Keep it up, I really love this poem, especially the last line.




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