normal on the outside; constantly
screaming on the inside.
i’ll do anything to feel numb. depression is painful,
but happiness in untrustworthy.
happiness and hope leave too easily.
depression is painful,
but at least it is a constant pain.
i can trust in pain…
at least, i have all this time.
maybe it’s time to trust
in something new,
to trust that control is an illusion,
to finally strive to have a good conversation,
to realize that the answer to life’s
difficulties is not suicide.
maybe it’s time to finally
be honest with myself.
maybe it’s time to completely
break down
so that i can finally
break free.