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Chaos Theory This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. This work has won the Teen Ink contest in its category.

By
Carolyn says she believes in angels
while mascara spiders creep thickly along the
heavy baggage beneath her eyes like the
black pitch of the school hallways at night or
the charcoal that she dips her fingernails in and I
remember cheating on my math test that morning
So
I tell her I believe in people.

Roasted honey nut, the color she was born with but
you really wouldn’t know it because of the midnight L’Oréal
she chooses, tragically highlighted with Punk Pink or
Raging Red from a bottle and 15
minutes of waiting –
It spills limply over her black eyes whenever she leans down to write and
Carolyn says she believes in fate.

In planets aligning in the universe and
Feng shui that keeps mice away and prevents ulcers but also
makes a girl fall in love with a boy but
I know all about chemistry and hormones and catalysts so I
think I believe in science.

In reincarnation, she thinks she’ll come back as a bird
Or maybe a peacock and I say I agree when I
see those striped stockings that come to her knees and
neon earrings lifeless at her shoulders but she only laughs …
tells me I never really see her and to
call her later.

Now with the dial tone in my ear
the cold trembling and I’m suffocating on nothing
because I really see her and I
know she believes in the afterlife but
she doesn’t believe in laughter and
the phone just rings and rings and rings …

Carolyn said she believed in angels.

This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.

This work has won the Teen Ink contest in its category. This piece won the January 2009 Teen Ink Poetry Contest.




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StrangerOnTheStreet said...
Mar. 8, 2011 at 4:01 pm
this is amazing, how real and raw it is.. i can really apprecitate it. it takes alot to be open about something like this and i really look up to you for it and olny hope i can be this open in my writing
 
. said...
Mar. 8, 2011 at 2:51 pm
this is pure and heavy and so simple. in just one word its raw. im so sorry for your loss. you can tell she ment alot to you and you were close to her. keep writting!
 
unique4evr said...
Mar. 5, 2011 at 11:32 pm

this is really good (i think) i am not really sure. iI don't quite understand it but iI really want to

please explain it to me! =( anyways iI can tell you are a deep person you will go far in life. keep it up! =)

 
jasmin said...
Mar. 5, 2011 at 9:08 am

thanks for commneting

i really loved yours

 
nightwolfsnow said...
Feb. 23, 2011 at 5:25 pm
Oh wow....I felt like I died at the end. This was amazing. :)
 
Only,I This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Feb. 21, 2011 at 1:15 am

Amazing, simply, purely amazing.

(:

 
cellogirl said...
Feb. 14, 2011 at 11:01 pm
wow, absolutely beautiful!
 
bobhot6 said...
Feb. 14, 2011 at 10:24 pm
Stream of conscienceness has never looked so good.
 
FlyleafFreak said...
Feb. 14, 2011 at 8:08 pm
Wow, the whole thing just made my breath leave my lungs. I honestly did not expect the ending. Great job and keep it up kiddo :)
 
TheKingThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Feb. 14, 2011 at 6:28 pm
I must admit I wish I understand this, but I really don't... in the end though it doesn't matter, the poem sounds great to ears even without a deep understanding of it.  Keep it up!
 
LastChapter replied...
Feb. 14, 2011 at 9:34 pm
to sum it up, the goth girl, carolyn, commits suicide (at least i think) and thinks its ok b/c she believes in angels. its such a shame you couldn't appreciate this poem, it was so amazing.
 
TheKingThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Feb. 15, 2011 at 6:23 pm
Do you really have to understand the entirety of a story to enjoy it?  In that case, I shouldnt like American Pie by Don McLean... people still debate what it means.  This poem was great, whether or not I got its deepest meanings
 
LauraAshley said...
Feb. 14, 2011 at 1:38 pm
have u ever considered going to a poetry reading, and reading this aloud...I think it would be quite amazing!!! Keep writing!
 
The_Delusional_Philosopher said...
Feb. 14, 2011 at 9:24 am
This poem makes me feel depressed. I like that.
 
silence-is-loud replied...
Mar. 12, 2011 at 8:17 pm
lol u like to be depressed... why?
 
Lonewolf1213 said...
Feb. 14, 2011 at 9:07 am
This was amazing! I really hope you keep writing, because this was brilliant.
 
alymarie3 said...
Jan. 31, 2011 at 4:38 pm
I absoultuly heart! I was looking around for inspirtation 4 this short story when i came upon yours...breathtaking..just wow
 
messed_chick said...
Jan. 25, 2011 at 10:11 pm
Somehow this poem makes me think. i like that a lot.
 
sethmeyerslover1234 said...
Jan. 24, 2011 at 6:53 pm
holy this is great!
 
Zwidon said...
Jan. 23, 2011 at 8:01 pm
I don't know if it was intended to be a spoken-word poem or not but it reads really well out loud. Perhaps you should consider performing it somewhere. It's really good.
 
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