Corner of First and Amistad

January 1, 2014
All I do these days is sit around
In the corner of my room
Never making a sound
And even though my eyes are wide open
I can’t see the palm in front of my face
Can’t see my life as it slowly decays

I feel so lost in the voids of my mind
Searching for something to put my mind to ease
But there is nothing I can find
Why do I feel the way I do
I have good friends around me
Yet I feel so blue

I feel like I’m losing my faith in people these days
I feel so lonely but I don’t want to go back to my friends
The very thing I want, I wish they’d stay away
What is it that I miss, what is it that I want
I’m still just sitting in the corner of my room
Trying to figure out my emotional assault

There is nothing wrong with me
There is nothing I can complain about
So why am I lost in thought, away from reality
Why am I so needy, desperate for you to keep me company
Why do I push every one away
So maybe you will finally come to me

Why do I sit in the corner, why not just go enjoy the day
Why can’t I cure my sorrows
I don’t want them to stay
I wish I knew how to fix these wounds, I wish I had the strength to do so
I don’t care to know what I feel
I just want to know how to stop these crippling blows.

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This article has 10 comments. Post your own now!

JRaye This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jan. 17, 2014 at 6:43 pm
Amazing - this is truly relatable to me :) You're an awesome writer! :)
Shahrier replied...
Jan. 18, 2014 at 10:30 pm
Thanks. teenink wont publish this poem of mine, but i think youd like this one better. (im gonna try to resubmit it again. 
  Some days are spent with, scribbles on paper with pen. My life runs through my mind, but I cannot write any of it down.   Some days are spent with hours wasted staring out the window. Watching as the wind blow, but I cannot find the strength to move.   Some days are spent with, shadows on my wall. Unlike me, they know ho... (more »)
starrynightangel said...
Jan. 4, 2014 at 4:56 am
This explains my life..   Loved it.. Keep writing :)
Shahrier replied...
Jan. 4, 2014 at 12:28 pm
i hope you recover if this sad tale represents your life. im still stuck in the fiery depths of hell, waiting for the day when ill stop hurting over the past. untill then, i will write to my hearts content. :)
Shahrier replied...
Jan. 4, 2014 at 12:43 pm
if this explains your life, i hope you soon recover. this is what my life is alike as well and i wish this pain upon no one. to escape the pain, even if temporarily, i write, and as long as i feel i will write.
haley101 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jan. 15, 2014 at 10:25 am
This is The Fray, am I right? First and Amistad is where he finds the one and only smoking a cigarette on the street corner? That's what struck me about the tittle. Check it out: You Found Me, The Fray  
Shahrier replied...
Jan. 15, 2014 at 9:02 pm
it is from the fray. "you found me" inspired the title. because god found him, pr he found himself, at the corner of first and amistad, and well, sometimes i feel im still lost, in the middle of nowhere. aka first and amistad. i love the fray and the script, and onerepublic, and much more.
haley101 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jan. 16, 2014 at 10:47 am
I can't believe that you love the music that I love. That's great. It's pretty cool that I caught that about the tittle too  
Shahrier replied...
Jan. 16, 2014 at 8:54 pm
i like other music too. i listen to a very wide selection. i like hopsin, tech n9ne, red, papa roach, imagine dragons and five finger death punch. ^_^ my friend calls my music bipolar. if you pay super close attention to my poems, every now and then, i would slip a line from a song into them. i better get back to homework. my teachers are really working me these days. 
haley101 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jan. 17, 2014 at 10:07 am
yes, teachers tend to do that; it's rather awful, is it not? your music is a tad bipolar, and you have even more of a range than I do. I listen to Winston and Shmidt, but then I'd go to Ron Pope and Imagine Dragons. totally different. but hey, whatever works. ;) have fun with the much work!
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