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If Only to be Free

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If only to be free from this pain ridden disease

If only I could soar as the eagle soars through the clear blue sky
If only I could prowl as the wolf prowls the star studded night
If only I could gallop as the horse gallops the wind whipped plains
If only I could surf as the dolphin surfs the deep blue waves
If only I could sing as the songbirds sing their song of everlasting freedom
If only I could leap as the frog leaps among the flat green lily pads
If only I could soar as the angel soars across the ever changing clouds

If only I could be free of this pain ridden disease



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mollybug13 said...
Dec. 31, 2013 at 9:47 pm
This is a really touching poem thats the only word I can think of to describe it. It has emotion and is really good. 5 stars.
 
Cat521 said...
Dec. 29, 2013 at 1:05 pm
I find this very meaningful because I live with bone injuries and things like that, which inhibit me similarly to what is probably your illness (but I don't really know for sure). It's meaningful but it's choppy and it doesn't have a flow to it, perhaps it needs to be less wordy with more intense words to create almost a beautiful image. There is an openness about this work and that's what makes it good, because it lets someone see what truly burdens you. 
 
Taconut7This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Dec. 30, 2013 at 3:41 am
Thanks for your feedback! This isn't one of my best poems, and I really appreciate your comments on it. I plan on editing this poem sometime in the near future. Btw: the disease I suffer from is anxiety/depression
 
Cat521 replied...
Dec. 30, 2013 at 2:11 pm
I understand and just remember that you're good at what you do. 
 
Taconut7This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Dec. 30, 2013 at 8:01 pm
Thanks, you are also good at what you write too :) Also, if you want to read on of my great poems, just read my poem "Mt Soul Reborn". It's about the darkest hour in my life and very vivid
 
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