Last Attempt

July 1, 2013
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So many failed attempts,
So few reasons to try,
I will do this one more time,
Because I can no longer fly,.
I lay in my bed,
Clutching the sheets in terror,
In sheer anticipation,
For I know what comes next,
And my heart races in my chest.
Finally the last light fades,
And so from my bed I rise,
I creak my door open,
Hesitate for a single moment,
Do I really want to do this?
Yes, this is my only way out.
I gently walk down the stairs,
Into the kitchen,
Flick on the light.
I pause, listening for signs of life,
Then continue my task.
I open the cabinet,
My eyes scanning for the bottle I know so well,
There. Ibuprofen.
My hands shaking, I pull the container down,
Twist it open in one practiced motion,
Not looking, I empty it's contents on the counter,
Fill a glass with water,
Lift the first pill up,
Wash it down with a gulp,
Again and again,
2,3,4,5,6,7,8 times,
I stop counting,
Those few minutes feel like hours,
And by the end I am eerily calm.
I climb back up the stairs,
Settle on my bed,
Say my last goodbyes in my heart,
And close my eyes.

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This article has 9 comments. Post your own now!

DragonAmericaThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
May 25, 2014 at 10:06 pm
great piece of work! It's so powerful! XD
BloodyMary said...
Aug. 24, 2013 at 3:13 am
Compelling, emotionally-riveting, rich, and vivid. 
S.S.Splatters said...
Aug. 7, 2013 at 7:05 pm
Wow that played a little story in my head I was agast as I read the ending
Fallenoutofgrace said...
Aug. 2, 2013 at 9:47 am
O.O... .... THIS IS INCREDIBLE!!! and super sad i'm having mixed emotion but i lvoe it. But please don't ever do this, beside that i think you took the topic and gave it wings well done.
sparrow-at-flight said...
Jul. 21, 2013 at 2:47 am
This....This is amazing....
HazelGrace said...
Jul. 17, 2013 at 3:32 pm
dsanfhds;lhsd,mnclkdsfkkfkfkfkfkkfhadsjf;lhrf'iewhr'eknfas c,sdm.nlw;ekfjk'lsaf fwjfmns.kndnhdbdwjnkkdkkdkdbsbsb i can't form coherent words. This is amazing. And terrible. all at the same time. Please dont kill yourself the world would not be a better place without you. By telling you that this is amazing I am not condoning its topic but I can't say that you didn't handle it beautifully
Waistband said...
Jul. 17, 2013 at 1:34 am
I love everything about this poem. This is the epidemy of poetry. So much emotion and passion poured into this plus all of the description and power behind it makes this one of the most beautiful poems I have read in a very long time if not of all time. Its relatable and vivid and amazing all the way around. All though the situation does make me wonder a little it doesnt take away from the perfection of this poem. Great job. :D  
JeremiahSamuelTemple said...
Jul. 12, 2013 at 3:27 am
This poem frightens me for your safety. I have been there and don't want another to find that place. I can't even think on an analytical level with this much emotion. You don't need to end it only to wake up finding things worse for yourself.
AdrienneMPayne This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 8, 2013 at 1:43 am
Conscious says that it's important to point out how terrible such a thing is...  And, at the risk of sounding morbid and insensitive (but hopefully not), to all who consider overdose...  It doesn't work, and it only makes you very, very sick.  Please don't. In George Michale's sense of the phrase, Choose Life. All that aside...  As a piece of literature, this poem was very systematic and straightforward, in a way   that is quite frightening.  Jus... (more »)
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