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Butterflys and Stars

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He smiles at the sight of a star,
laughs at the sight of the sky.
But why does he cry while he spies on a rose,
or cringe at the sight of a crown.

She smiles at the sight of a flower,
dances while she spies pretty wings.
But why does she cry when she sees a blue sky,
or feel sorrow when she hears a short song.

They both lost a friend of importance,
they both saw them float to the sky.
They both know they’re safe when they smile.
They both laugh when they see life restor’d.



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This article has 5 comments. Post your own!

OldYoungOne said...
Aug. 6, 2013 at 4:58 pm:
Refreshing for me to read. The word choice and the image relaxed me and at the same time had me puzzled. I liked it for its surprise and simplicity yet complexity but it is rough around the edges due to how the words did indeed flow.
 
allhallowsevekatieThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Sept. 4, 2013 at 1:30 pm :
thank you so much :)
 
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Alon93 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 31, 2013 at 3:37 am:
Beautiful poem. I was expecting it to flow differently, but the fact that you managed to surprise me is wonderful! Needs a bit of refining for 5 stars (maybe play around with the wording - perhaps use really 'light' words, that allude to floating or flying; symbolic of a butterfly), but it's definitely a great piece of writing!
 
allhallowsevekatieThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Sept. 4, 2013 at 1:30 pm :
i will try to edit it :) thank you so much
 
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Jade.I.AmThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Apr. 23, 2013 at 6:03 pm:
pretty wooooords lol sorry. alrighty....i thought your word choice was cool, and i love imagery so that was awesome........and now i get it! lol good job
 
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