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Shaking

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My hands are shaking.
They have been ever since we talked last
About my future
And your past.
I don’t want you to know
That I can barely pour my coffee
Or write this message:
My pain isn’t yours to see.
I could hardly get dressed this morning,
And in the shower I almost fell,
But I’m glad you didn’t witness that,
Glad you don’t see my hell.
When we talked I was so sure
That I could do this just fine,
But how can I be alright
When you might never be mine?
The concept of soulmates
Is silly and childish,
But if you are my soulmate,
It would fulfill my dearest wish.
I love you, darling,
With all my heart,
And I know you love me too;
You’ll realize it while we’re apart.
Maybe it’s just wishful thinking,
The fancies of a child.
Maybe it’s nothing more
Than a heart gone wild.
But would I be shaking like this
If that were the case?
Would every thought, every sight,
Remind me of your face?
I know you said you need time
To get over whatever happened before,
But I would never hurt you;
I’m not who I was before.
I won’t push my luck, not again.
I’ll wait for you to come to me
Instead of endlessly pursuing;
I’ll wait for you to finally see.
I’ll bear this shaking
Of heart, soul, and body
For the chance that someday
You’ll tell me you love me.



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