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How Are You?
How are you?" they ask. Well,
I'm sad because God took away my Granny away from me
and I can't do anything about it.
I'm frustrated because I can't reach her expectations
and I'm failing her with each sin I commit.
I'm depressed because my Mom is the only on that thinks I'm beautiful
but I know better to believe her.
I'm forlorn because God took Shaniah away
and she didn't even fully live.
I'm ashamed because of all the times I saw her in the hallway
and I never stopped to say hi.
I'm regretful that I never made the effort
to regain the friendship we had.
I'm disappointed because my only talent is writing
idiotic poetry that no one will ever read.
I'm crestfallen that I can't sleep forever
and just live in my dreams.
I'm scared because I'm attempting to contemplate the purpose of life
and when the time comes Peter will tell me I'm not on the guest list.
I'm dejected because my mother is all alone
and she's constantly bitter.
I'm furious because my Father can sleep around and live in sin
with a different woman and be happy.
I'm frightened because I am doubting God
and thinking impure thoughts.
I'm terrified because I just want to take a long drag of temporary numbness
and forget my name.
I'm petrified because every night I think I'll die in my sleep
but I still refuse to change.
I'm embarrassed because I lie about my "love life"
so no one will realize how lonely I am.
I'm apathetic because I'm too moronic to go to college
but I'll apply anyway because that's the thing to do.
I'm heartbroken because a homeless man asked me for money
and I had nothing to give.
I'm downtrodden because people are hurting and dying
and I'm too selfish and stupid to save them.
I'm craving to be immortal and to know infinite feels
but I'm too vapid to feel like Charlie.
I'm infinitesimal because I finally realized
how insignificant and nugatory I really am
in the grand scheme of things.
But what I'll just reply with,
"I'm just fine, thank you! And how are you?"