Flawed Adonis

May 29, 2012
By IAmTheOceanIAmTheSea SILVER, Scottsdale, Arizona
IAmTheOceanIAmTheSea SILVER, Scottsdale, Arizona
9 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I think there is only one greatness for man. If a man can bridge the gap between life and death. I mean, if he can live on after he has died, maybe he was a great man. To me the only success, the only greatness, is immortality."--James Dean

My eyes have been deceived
The perfection of him was less than I perceived
The sparkle of his eyes
Hid all of his lies
And the beauty of his face
Hid the flaws of his disgrace

"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder", or so they say,
His presence and existence was equal to the
Start of a new day
But as time went by,
I revealed his lie,
And the brilliance that I had once longed for...
Was suddenly no more

The author's comments:
I wrote "Flawed Adonis" as part of an English final in my junior year of high school. We had to choose 6 writers from the early 20th century to imitate. 5 poems, one short story. This one was imitating Robert Frost. This has a lot of personal experience in it. I was in love with a boy for 8 months and I believed he was pure perfection. Then one day, I noticed his flaws started to surface. Hence the title.

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This article has 2 comments.

on Jul. 19 2012 at 2:59 pm
AlmostPublished GOLD, Phoenix, Arizona
11 articles 0 photos 29 comments

Favorite Quote:
Live for today,because yesterday is gone and tomarrow may never come.

Classic love portrayed gracefully in words, one of the best on teen ink.

elizamc83 GOLD said...
on Jun. 19 2012 at 5:35 pm
elizamc83 GOLD, Concord, Massachusetts
17 articles 0 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
"From now on, I don't care if my tea leaves spell 'Die, Ron, die,' I'm chucking them in the bin where they belong." -Ron Weasley

really well done! rhyming doesn't always do much for a poem or takes away from the main ideas, but your use of rhyme worked very well, and I totally understand the seeing people's flaws after the perfection wears off. nice job, keep on writing! :)

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