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Texting

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Dark, small, smug room
Surrounds me,
I ponder and procrastinate.
Message sent.
Waiting, anticipating,
Check phone…
Thoughts of self-hate spill over.
“What is she doing?”
“Why is she taking so long?”
The mind spins like an old film reel,
Projecting the worst possible scenario
Over and over…

Suddenly, light! Vibration!
Clammy hands shoot like a dart in a bar.
Hands hold nervously,
Sorrow filled eyes gaze,
Over standard black and white text.
My heart sinks like a warship,
Mind not willing to comprehend
“How could this be?”
“What did I do wrong?”
My heart plunges towards my stomach
Like a rock at sea, surrounded and overwhelmed.
“Can I accept this?”
“What can I do?”

I optimistically re-read, looking for an error.
No such luck.
Screen to screen,
Not face to face,
She ended us.
“How can I move on?”
“Am I even ready?”
Time is the almighty healer
Of a flawed connection.





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