Swings

There are the days I feel like I’m flying
The days where I’m invincible
The moments I could jump off a bridge with no fear
Fall through the air without a tear
Days where I actually can bear to look at my own face in the mirror
Long sleepless nights where I twist in my sheets.
The morning’s I wake up and wonderwhatt I’ve done
Or who I’ve offended
My manic moments before my collapse
Before I fall deep into a hole
Into the dark
The numbness
The fear
The need to feel loved
The loss of my hope
The loss of my Faith
Weeks of just nothingness
Seconds where I could jump off a bridge with no second thought
Fall through the air, having not fought
Days that I fear, just glancing in the mirror
Yawning and yawning and rubbing my eyes
Wishing for a few more hours of sleep.
The anger arising and lashing out
The guilt of the living
The fear of the death
Yearning for the pain
Anything to not feel so numb
The Highs and the lows
The ups and the downs
Never knowing what tomorrow will bring
Just wishing to be normal…
To be
Happy.





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