December 17, 2011
Open the car door
Eyes met with relief as you see him behind the wheel
Doubts that it wouldn’t be him vanish
You slide into the seat
Huge smile plastered on your face
You drive for a while making the effortless chatter that you missed
“January 3rd I'm going to Arizona” he says
Your smile vanishes
And your head turns away from him to the cold window
“You’ll come and visits me of course! It’ll be great”
You watch trees
Dark and ominous against the night sky
“You know this is a great opportunity for me and I can’t turn it down”
In hope of a new speech or
Or a just kidding
You find yourself praying to these trees
“Its beautiful there, cactuses, deserts when you come and visit it will be so fun…”
You listen to the sound of his voice as a scene is painted before you
You can see the cacti, the sand
You can even see you and your dad walking in it
Together, side by side
But that image quickly vanishes
Instead replaced by a desolate desert in need of new habitants
“The weather there is always great! Especially when it’s so cold down here! You’ll love it”
Once again you feel yourself being lulled by his words
You want to make your shield vanish
And crawl into his arms and believe him
But it can’t
It won’t
Its too strong now from the help of the countless broken hearts and false hope
It knows better
You and the car stop in the driveway
You grab your bag and run inside

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