Winter's Wind

December 8, 2011
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Grasp at the idea,
hold on to the air.
You wonder when you fall,
who's going to be there?
Drop your emotions
and look up to the sky,
break from her prison
and try to understand why.
Lay on the ground;
the ice covers your hair,
everything is numb;
you try so hard to care.
The wind whistles
and it looks you in the eye,
but you cant turn away
no matter how hard you try.
It uncovers your facade;
you've encountered something rare.
It has opened the world to your eyes-
to a life that isn't fair.
Hear the scattered voices
and decipher the lie.
You lift your head up off the ground
with a last, definitive sigh.

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Emily said...
Jan. 17, 2012 at 2:22 pm
This is a pretty good poem! The rhyme works well; the rhythm isn't bad. It was kind of cryptic, though. I sort of liked that it was cryptic, but at the same time, knowing more specifically what the poem was about would have made me care more throughout all the awesome rhyming. Just a suggestion! :)
jbjones87 replied...
Jan. 17, 2012 at 2:33 pm
thanks for the feedback emily. :) yeah, i wrote it to be cryptic. i like people to take it for what they think it means. just curious, what was your take on what it means?
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