Cigarette butts, roaches, embers glow,
As you take it in, it takes you in.
Because you don’t like the band that’s playing
And you want something Momma told you you couldn’t have,
So you can say you’ve had it and you wouldn’t be lying.
Even though you lie through your molars and gums,
She doesn’t suspect anything. You know she does the same.
The lies sneak through the gap in her two front teeth.
You have the same gap, but it’s further back.
You want to hide the evidence that you are her.
You even smoke like her, you’ve seen pictures.
Bet you dance like her, too.
Another drag. You burn out.
For a moment you feel detached, as if you’re not her,
Until you remember afternoons spent cooking and sweeping,
Belting sacred words like banshees on Broadway.
Mouth the words you wish you could speak, the holy language,
But you forgot how. For once, that’s the truth.
Another drag. The flakes warm your heart.
You burn out.