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"I Didn't Know"

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I didn’t know I loved the smell of coffee on Sundays,
Sipping it, wearing a nightgown, reading the paper.
I didn’t know how much I loved saying nothing,
Until I let myself.
I didn’t know I liked picking up other people’s words
When they were dropped.
I didn’t know what barefoot felt like,
Until I hurt my soles, soles becoming leather,
Until I felt like some Puerto Rican grandma
Whose shoes are falling apart.
How could I have known how much I like the beauty
Of things falling apart,
Because we all do at times?
I didn’t know I loved tonight,
Until I stayed up through all of it,
Wondering what everyone was doing,
With the lights off, at that exact moment.
And then it was gone.
I didn’t know I liked to cackle,
Which makes me grin,
Which I also like (when it’s from the heart.)
I didn’t know how to embrace the rain,
Until I pranced in it,
Swallowed it,
And caught a cold because of it.
I didn’t know I needed home,
Until I wasn’t in it, and didn’t have one.
I thought I liked the sound of car crashes
Until Momma told me he died in one,
Which made me change my mind.
I didn’t know I loved the sound of typewriter keys
Until I smashed them,
With savage fingers,
So they all went off at once,
Jangling, percussive,
My literary philharmonic.





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This article has 4 comments. Post your own now!

reader123 said...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 2:11 pm
This put me to tears, the world is faced with so much loss, so please don't let your talent be lost. You made me re-think about my family...and how much I miss them.
 
waver1der95 said...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 12:51 am

Riveting and beautiful and bold.

"I'm sick of just liking people.  I wish to God I could meet someone I could respect," as Zooey would say.  

And you my dear Sylvia Salinger: I have found you are respected by all the stars in the sky.

 
SylviaSalinger replied...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 12:56 am
Thank you so much! I love Franny and Zooey. It's the best. Much appreciated man!
 
proud mamma pal replied...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 10:27 am

"...I like the beauty of things falling apart" So very honest and true of many, a raw admission of enduring loss. Wise beyond your years.

Well done.

 
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