Town of Memories This work is considered exceptional by our editorial staff.

November 4, 2011
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My town is a secret.
From the shimmering surface of the lake
Where summers dwindle to an anti-climax.
The twisting houses along roads
Slowly turned to dust
Trails of worn sneakers
Past the school no longer recognized
By the mansion full of wraiths and the road
Only she lives down there.
The faded blue boards of a store
Surrounded by unnaturally coloured ground.
The factory where clay people are born
Her house, the one who runs everyday.
Post Office, Train Station, broken down
Abandoned iron
Skate Park where sweet smoke drifts from the benches
The house full of newly made adults
Across, so many children yet none
Always talking behind drawn shades
The perfect closed community
Where fights go on behind closed doors
And become picked at until they’re clean
Until we make our own community
That’s how my town works





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JustAnotherOwl said...
Jan. 28, 2012 at 6:35 pm
I agree with dontforget; it reminded me of an old town in the country, too! I really liked this! The language isn't exactly consistent, though, I noticed that too. You use very colorful words and then toward the end, less so. Maybe you did that on purpose? Anyway, I liked this!
 
EmmaNemma replied...
Jan. 28, 2012 at 9:42 pm
I didn't use as much descriptive language towards the end because it was when I began to talk about the bad side of my town. I wanted that part to be slightly dry because that's how I view the way people in my town handle issues.
 
JoPepper said...
Jan. 28, 2012 at 3:08 pm
That was very good I really liked it, I kind of imagined a ghost town. But was it a quiet town with alot of personal problems and is hiding from everybody or someone?
 
dontforget This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Nov. 23, 2011 at 7:27 pm
Your imagery, especially in the beginning is beautiful! This town is very interesting to me, especially the line about anti-climatic summers, it reminds me of my old town in the country. Great job. The only thing i would change is how it begins sort of mellow and colorful and sort of spindles into a dreary tone...just something i noticed.
 
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