I will never read you my first poem
Because I learned once that before you can write something, you have to face the scary things
I will never read you my first poem,
about the way I craved all the right things from all the wrong places.
about the nights where it was between cutting out and cutting up
cutting wounds,
or cutting drugs
when i had to talk to myself in the mirror
every morning before school.
I will never read you my first poem,
because when i started writing about you,
i actually started making sense to myself
and i had hoped i was just being a litt stupid.
i will never read you my first poem, my love,
but maybe one day, you’ll hear the second one.
maybe somebody angry will find the words to read it to you.
maybe, baby, one of these days once i’m all swallowed up in the bowels of some terrible monster, you’ll hear my second poem.
You’ll understand that part of me that never stopped screaming. from that night on, a part of me never stopped bleeding, either.