Well, Mary Jane had to love his tight,
form-fitting suit
That clutched onto his every muscle like a girl too scared to leave her mother's side
And she had to love his remarkable
quick reflexes
And she had to love, of course, how he had saved her from evil so many times
But what she really couldn't stand
Was how that tight, form-fitting suit
made him come home
Reeking of sweat and rancid sewers like
a foul gutter rat
Or how those remarkable reflexes always kept him one step ahead of her
Or how his acts of heroism never
went unnoticed
Or how she had to thank that clingy
spider every day for saving her life.