Alone

October 17, 2011
By illusions GOLD, I Dontg Even Like This Town, Other
illusions GOLD, I Dontg Even Like This Town, Other
10 articles 0 photos 150 comments

She used to be jolly but after they did that she detested herself.
She used to be self assured; now she insicure, wondering if she's a waste of space.
She gave you people her all, but you proved thats she's worthless.
They took the fact that she was a lover and used it agenst her till she exploded.
You changed her, you messed with her head.
You lied to her, you said that you were her friends.
You played her, made her think that you were something else.
now she's broken. The only thing she did was trust you.
Right now she feels unloved, unwanted, AND UNCARED FOR.
She feels like me.
And that feeling is alone.



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This article has 20 comments.


illusions GOLD said...
on Apr. 11 2012 at 8:51 am
illusions GOLD, I Dontg Even Like This Town, Other
10 articles 0 photos 150 comments
Thank you! And i sure will. :):)

on Apr. 6 2012 at 7:00 pm
Shahiro PLATINUM, Johnston, Iowa
20 articles 2 photos 262 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Soon we must all choose between what is right and what is easy." - Dumbledore (Goblet of Fire)

I really like this! I Felt alone a lot before, I grew up teaching my self things the hard way since I didn't have people to help me. They were always busy. This poem is soooo easy to relate to, that is such a good thing for poems.( just so u know) nice job. Ps. Please read rate and comment on my work!!! Thx

on Mar. 30 2012 at 12:19 pm
IamtheshyStargirl PLATINUM, Lothlorien, Utah
44 articles 16 photos 2216 comments

Favorite Quote:
Boredom instigates extreme creativity.
~Amoniel

"Bowing gratefully to all of my subjects, 'thank you. Thank you. The pleasure is mine." Nah, I'm just kidding. We're all kings together.'"
~Thesilentraven

So sad, your juxtoposition is really good. 

There were a few spelling mistakes; 'insicure' should be 'insecure', and you've got an extra s after 'that' in "but you proved thats she's worthless".

I imagine that your later work improves, as this is your first submition :)


on Mar. 16 2012 at 2:36 pm
Devils.Angel GOLD, Drumheller, Other
12 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
"all good ppl die young"
"a lawful kiss is never worth a stolen one"

I know exactly how she feels. Being used all the time and no one seems to care. Its not a good feeling its actually quiet terrible.......I loved the way you used her feelingts iin this poem.

on Feb. 22 2012 at 7:45 pm
PoetryAngel14 PLATINUM, Ithaca, New York
26 articles 0 photos 53 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Dare to be imperfect and one day there will tug at your sleeve a soulmate." ~Robert Brault
"Life is like riding a bicycle - in order to keep your balance, you must keep moving." ~Albert Einstein

you're welcome :)

illusions GOLD said...
on Feb. 22 2012 at 3:19 pm
illusions GOLD, I Dontg Even Like This Town, Other
10 articles 0 photos 150 comments
thank you all for taking time to comment!

illusions GOLD said...
on Feb. 22 2012 at 3:18 pm
illusions GOLD, I Dontg Even Like This Town, Other
10 articles 0 photos 150 comments
thank you soooooo much! that means the world to me

on Feb. 20 2012 at 2:10 pm
Scribbler-of-Dreams PLATINUM, Brandon, Florida
23 articles 0 photos 73 comments

Favorite Quote:
Love isn't everything we want, but it's everything we need....

So sad...:(

on Feb. 16 2012 at 9:59 pm
PoetryAngel14 PLATINUM, Ithaca, New York
26 articles 0 photos 53 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Dare to be imperfect and one day there will tug at your sleeve a soulmate." ~Robert Brault
"Life is like riding a bicycle - in order to keep your balance, you must keep moving." ~Albert Einstein

Deep, a bit depressing, and emotional. Good job getting that emotion in writing. You captured it well. Excellent work :) you are a wonderful poet.

staffy GOLD said...
on Feb. 11 2012 at 1:57 pm
staffy GOLD, Courtice, Other
19 articles 3 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
you were born a origianl. don't die a copy.-jason mason
i am beautiful for god makes no mistake.-Lady GaGa

nice work. the best poetry come from emotion that most people can relate to. nice work.

Fm363 SILVER said...
on Jan. 12 2012 at 5:27 pm
Fm363 SILVER, Sauk Rapids, Minnesota
8 articles 1 photo 2 comments
I love this...

on Dec. 20 2011 at 3:06 pm
SpringMoon98 GOLD, Ava, New York
11 articles 0 photos 12 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Everyone wants to change the world, but do they ever stop to think about changing themselves?"
Leo Tolstoy

This is a nice poem and it's a little sad but it's meant to be I guess. Overall I like it

illusions GOLD said...
on Dec. 5 2011 at 2:23 pm
illusions GOLD, I Dontg Even Like This Town, Other
10 articles 0 photos 150 comments
Thank you....!

on Dec. 2 2011 at 4:52 pm
Goddess PLATINUM, Connellsville, Pennsylvania
27 articles 0 photos 73 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today.”

beautiful. it reminds me how i am. such pain only meant to be written. great job

 


illusions GOLD said...
on Nov. 21 2011 at 2:43 pm
illusions GOLD, I Dontg Even Like This Town, Other
10 articles 0 photos 150 comments
wow, thank you!!!

on Nov. 17 2011 at 4:10 pm
Dreamgirl95 BRONZE, Sugarland, Texas
4 articles 0 photos 63 comments

Favorite Quote:
Dreams are illustrations... from the book your soul is writing about you.

This is amazing, and really relatable. Great Job:)

illusions GOLD said...
on Nov. 8 2011 at 2:22 pm
illusions GOLD, I Dontg Even Like This Town, Other
10 articles 0 photos 150 comments
Ya, and thank you

Risible SILVER said...
on Nov. 7 2011 at 5:00 pm
Risible SILVER, Norwalk, Connecticut
7 articles 0 photos 59 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Sooner or later, those who win are those who think they can." -Richard Bach

I'd love to! Is your newer work pending? 

illusions GOLD said...
on Nov. 7 2011 at 2:51 pm
illusions GOLD, I Dontg Even Like This Town, Other
10 articles 0 photos 150 comments
I will thnx, can you check out some of my new work, plz?!?

Risible SILVER said...
on Nov. 5 2011 at 3:20 pm
Risible SILVER, Norwalk, Connecticut
7 articles 0 photos 59 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Sooner or later, those who win are those who think they can." -Richard Bach

I can really tell that you're writing because you need to. Both your poems have awesome topics and direction, but could be fine tuned. The emotion seems to be breaking out from you on to the page and shapes itself into poetry and it's lovely and you have raw talent and purpose to write, but a little tuning would make it brillant. Thanks so much for sharing. If you get a chance, let me know what you think of writing. :) 


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