Weight of the World (Atlas)

September 26, 2011
By HolesInTheHeart GOLD, Centerville, Iowa
HolesInTheHeart GOLD, Centerville, Iowa
16 articles 9 photos 24 comments

On my shoulders
I carry
The full blown
Weight of my world
I sometimes wonder
How a body as pathetic
As mine
Has held up for so long
Under pressure
So much of it
Too much...
My thoughts, my burden, my heart...
Each must weigh a ton, at least, on their own
My hopes, my dreams, my expectations...
My pride...
My struggle...
I must be stronger
Than I think
But the things
That I've found
Are hardest to bear
Are my memories...
My losses...
My flaws...
My fears...
The fear that I
Might not be good enough
For you
For anyone
That thought
Weighs me down
More than you'll ever know
So heavy on
My small shoulders
So overwhelming
Like I'm lugging around
The whole world
On my back
And I'm tired...
Tired of carrying this fear
Tired of carrying this weight
I won't hold up
If it lasts much longer
The things we carry
Make us who we are
But if that's true
What does that make me?
A walking disaster
Waiting to happen?
If I continue to carry
All of these burdens
To prove to You
To everyone
That I'm the best I can be
And it's still not enough...
The why bother?
Why do I continue
To try?
So loyal
So obedient
Another burden of mine
Weighing me down
Like a house full
Of lead
Just like Atlas
To supporting
The world on his shoulders
Can't put it down
Can't take a rest
From his duties
Because so many
Depend on him
Take his burdens
For granted
Just like You
And Me
I hold my world
And still make time
To help hold yours
But it's not enough
Never enough
You say I'm flawed
And I am
Nobody's perfect
But I try
I'll always try
And I'll always
Be there
To help hold up
Your world
As much as mine
May weigh me down

The author's comments:
Inspired by "The Things They Carried", a book about the war in Vietnam

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