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Without You

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Everything around me was dark in my mind.

Nothing meant anything to me anymore, everything seemed like nothingness.

I glanced around as everything came into actual view.

There we children playing, with their mothers and fathers watching from afar.

I let out a sigh and rand my hands down my face feeling so crappy inside.

I didn't understand why I was here, without you.

When we were young we used to play in this park together.

We used to swing on those swings, or slide on those exact slides.

When we were in middle school we began dating.

In high school I was the quarterback and you were the head cheerleader.

But that all changed in our senior year.

We made one simple mistake, and it began destroying us, and those close to us.

You were kicked off the cheer team.

I had to quit the football team and leave school forever.

You tried your hardest to get by, to make everything better, but it didn't work.

In the end nothing worked.

Your family shunned you, and you came into my family.

My parents put on happy faces for us, but lied in the end.

We had no money, and I worked two jobs trying to get by, but still failing in the end.

You began failing in school, and all your friends ignored you.

I tried to comfort you, but you began going through depression and wouldn't allow me near you.

We used to be so close, but then we were so far away.

Then finally, that one day came and I felt so happy, and you did for some time.

But after that, your depression just got worse.

Then suddenly it turned out that you had a heart problem.

A few months later you were rushed to the emergency center after a heart attack.

I had waited in agony to see if you were okay, if you would still be there.

But then, the doctor had come back and my heart broke.

Never to see your smiling face you had when we were together again.

Never to see you.

But here I was, thinking of this all over again.

Then my mind came back to reality when I noticed the little girl with brown curls and hazel eyes to come over to me.

Her bright smile, as she looked at me.

"Daddy, will you come push me on the swings?" She said cheerfully to me.

And when I smiled, it felt like I never had in an eternity.

"Sure" I replied as I took your extended hand and walked with her the swings.

The swings I had gone on with you.

But I know we will never have this again.

You are gone.

I loved you.

You loved me, even if you didn't tell me.

But now, I have someone else to love.

Our daughter who looks and reminds me of you

Even if I was without you.





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