I don’t think I can do this to you or myself
I let myself believe I could be strong
But I realized I’m not
I’m to myself and everyone else especially you
I can’t stand it always being nice to you when inside
I just want to rip free from this
Return to when you never knew
And pray upon never letting you find out
You talk
So highly about her
Your phone calls and laughs that we never had
I want to cry
Rip free from this misery of loneliness out of me forever
I did this
By letting you know
I wish you would understand
I only respond to assure you I’m okay when … I’m not
I try to hide it to help you move on
It’s not working
My confidence had dropped
Despair
Mind racing decisions not the same and never will be….