Outside Looking In

By , Hillsboro, OR
If you are on the outside looking in then you may know
that my parents love me
that my siblings are nice to me
that my grades are high
that my insults are low.
If you are on the outside looking in then you may think my life is perfect.
If you are on the outside looking in then you may know
that I’m loud and sometimes obnoxious
that when I’m frustrated I sometimes cry
that when my day is bad a book can make it better
that writing makes my mind seem less cramped.
If you on the outside looking in then you may think I’m just another girl.
If you are on the outside looking in then you don’t know
that I don’t know where I belong
that I’ve never been someone’s best friend
that I’m really just a quiet little girl whose mind won’t shut up
that my relationship with my mother is okay at best.
If you are on the outside looking in then you don’t know I want to be someone else.
If you are on the outside looking in then you don’t know
that my heart has been broken several times and the pieces have never been sewn back together
that my mind tells me one thing while my heart tells me something else
that family is family no matter what
that if a friend needed me at 2 a.m. I would be there in a second if I can.
If you are on the outside looking in then you don’t know what I’ve been through.
I am on the inside looking out and I wish
someone would ask me how I am and actually want to know the answer
someone would love me for me and not for the me I show everyone else
someone would care enough to let me be myself in all situations possible
someone would understand how weak I really am
someone would understand how much I need someone to help me when I fall
someone would know me the way I do and not walk away
someone would mend my broken heart with gorilla tape so that it never breaks again
someone wouldn’t hide everything because they think I’m someone I’m not
I am on the inside looking out and I wish that somebody loved me.





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