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Who I Am Without You
It’s like a blackout
Where I’ve lost my flashlight
And we never bought those emergency candles.
I wait awake all night
For the power to come back on
So I can find you
But it never does and hours become days.
I’m alone in this darkness
It’s like the first day in a new town.
I’ve forgotten where everything is
And I don’t know anyone.
Except I still live in the same town,
I just never found my own way.
It’s like walking down the street
When all of a sudden the street ends.
Just a gaping hole in the ground
Where the path I knew used to be.
I didn’t see it coming
But I can see you from across the way.
I want to find you
But I don’t know how.
It’s like getting a new phone
And every number is there but yours.
No one answers when I call,
No one comes when I shout.
You’re supposed to be the one who answers.
But you don’t this time.
No one does.
It’s like waking up from the longest dream
Then looking in the mirror
And not recognizing my own face anymore.
I don’t remember these eyes
And I start to wonder when they changed.
I forgot how I looked without you.
It’s like being thrown on a stage naked.
You were supposed to protect me
But now I’m vulnerable and cold
Under everyone’s pitying stares.
You left me naked and exposed
Because I let you be my clothes.
It’s like accidentally breaking my favorite thing.
I hold the pieces in my hand,
Tangible and fragile,
Trying to pretend it’s the same,
That it can still be the same again,
But in the back of my mind I know that’s not true.
I’d just never let myself acknowledge that.
It’s like realizing I forgot the tune to my favorite song.
It was always safe in the back of my mind
And we were always humming along
Then suddenly it’s gone.
I can’t remember a single note
But it’s still my favorite.