Steadfast

November 5, 2010
By Anonymous

The Last Straw
The final word
Compromise
I’ll die
Not for me
I won’t do it again
I’ve compromised so far
I refuse to go any further
Don’t tell me something I already know
Tell me something that I don’t know
I can’t go there
I have to go here
I’m not like everyone else
This is not a hobby
This is my dream
Uncertainty is my blanket
The future is uncertain
I’ve already thought this thru
You weren’t there to see
The mess I went thru
Trying to find the perfect place
At the perfect price
The mess I put myself through
Trying to get your attention
And now you’re telling me to lower my bar against the ground.
I can’t squeeze under there
You hand me a shovel to dig under
I’ve seen how others have gone
This isn’t the way for me
You’re asking me to dig my grave
This isn’t a stepping stone
This is my pit
I’ve always found a way to get through it
Around it.
Why can’t you?
Training isn’t the way to poverty
Training is the way to my happiness
Training may seem stupid
But to me
An apprentice
Of the craft
It is not
A
Waste
Of
My energy
Time
It is a way
For me
To control
My life
My schedule
My dream
Let me
Live it
Let me
Alone
Let me
Go


The author's comments:
I wrote this piece due to an argument that I recently had about college and my parent wanted me to compromise further about when, where and how I would attend. They had not heard about my plans or my decisions and when I mentioned about wanting (wanting, I was planning on attending a different school that was considerably less) to go to a school that was approx 26000 a year, they misinterpreted. They wanted for me to lower my expectation further because it would be "cheaper" to attend a community college and they didn't have the money to send me to the one that I wanted (again I wanted but I denied myself that). Long story short I didn't say everything I wanted to say so I wrote it down instead to vent.

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