I wish life were that of a pencil
I could erase details of life I didn’t want
But in the end I would feel fake
And in the end I would just taunt Myself
For not letting things be
Oh god!
These recurring thoughts wipe them away
Wipe away the jealous friend from within me
Wipe away the scared loneliness from me
Wipe away the openness from me
Because it leaves me alone
Wanting
Needing
I am alone
It was my path
I am a puzzle that will never fit
Unless I tucked here
Maybe there
But
But
I would feel
UNCOMFORTABLE!!
Ashamed
For hiding
I would tremble
Until I broke myself
I am already scattered in pieces
But that would just shatter me
I can’t hide
I won’t
I don’t want to have to want
I don’t want to have to need
I just want content
But isn’t that also wanting
Oh why am I always left in this endless cycle of spinning