What lies beneath me

I cut myself
Just a little scratch
Enough to reach under the skin
To reach into myself
To find what I am
Underneath it all
All the lies, all the pain
What hides under the callouses
Is there a soul?
An empty void?
Is Jesus hiding in there?
Like some tell me
Is there a little boy?
A little girl?
Or is my body full of butterflies
Leaking out with each truth
Dying with each wound?
Is there an alien
Hiding in my chest?
A worm hiding in my brain?
If I pull the skin off what will I find?
A little hamster on a rusty exercise wheel?
The meaning of life?
A 42 programmed in there?
Will I find my true feelings?
Unjustified, unjumbled? undamaged?
I don't really know
I'm just tired of wearing this skin