Shots of Gray

August 10, 2010
As I sit there
And stare at the sky
With shots of gray
And orange
Where the blue
Birds fly
Across from me
Is you
Whispering why…
A shimmering gold
And white
With colors confused
But completely correct
I admire the natural
Beauty of your
Glassy eyes
Deep is your soul
But shallow is
Your heart
Weakness of mind
Is your suit
Along with the
One of shame
Of my distraught
Your flesh is warm
But your blood
Runs cold
My heartbeat is
Often increased by
The mere tone
Of your whimper
If I could
Choose a sky
In which to soar
I would most
Certainly choose the
One with shots
Of gray.

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This article has 2 comments. Post your own now!

Calliashi said...
Sept. 28, 2011 at 7:01 pm

I couldn't really get a feel or anything like your work usually gives me. I didn't really understand what it was about. Not one of your better works.


3/5 (sorry, I'm really hard to please when it comes to free verse)

thepreechyteenager said...
Sept. 8, 2010 at 5:23 pm

I would have made a clearer connection between the sky and this guy's eyes.  At least I think that is what you're comparing.  Not really sure... ?

Anyway, this most certainly had a very poetic and beautiful atmosphere.  That was really amazing.  I especially like the part about the guys flesh versus his blood.  Really cool um... well it wasn;t imagery, because I wasn't feeling it, but I could feel the coldness and the warmpth.

good job, 4 stars

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