Hopeless

June 16, 2010
By Swiwi17 SILVER, Glasscity, Nevada
Swiwi17 SILVER, Glasscity, Nevada
8 articles 0 photos 29 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Nothing ever promised tomorrow today"


Unsure of where this happiness is emerging from. Not searching for it, not wanting it.
It's surrounded me and I can't help but let it. I'm completely out of control.
It shows on the outside, yet the inside can't match.
It's my armor against them, to save myself. I'm unsure of what's being saved.
I'm not doing the saving. I'd much rather have let myself drown.
Longing to have a definition as to who I am, what this is, what I'm doing, why I'm here.
No explanation given, no remorse, no letting up. I take what's dealt not expecting a break.
They hit me constantly, even though I'm already so far down.
They take what's left, every ounce every breath.
Until all I have is this armor of happiness. There is nothing inside. Not a person, not a life because it's not living. No wants, no needs, no cares, no desires, no motivation, no feeling. Not even a being left inside. Just the carcass of what once was, a beautiful person.
It's completely fair. For whatever reason, I deserve this, all of it that I'm getting. I'm taking it, I'm claiming it, I have no idea why. I feel but one thing, and that would be sorry for those who will never know the real me, and who I was. I miss that person more than any of my friends, or family that I’ve left behind.
The empty corpse that remains of "me" is scarred with my mistakes, my past, my regrets, my failures. No matter what new being fills the inside of this outer skin, if one ever does again, the scars will always be carried, the past will always follow, and I guess I'll just have to keep filling "me" with new beings, until I find one that can deal with the daily shit, maintain actual feelings, manage the scars, and match the happiness that shows on the outside.
Until that new "me" comes around to fill this emptiness,
I'll remain just that; Empty, alone, and hopeless.

The author's comments:
All I ask, is that you Judge hard this piece of writing, no need to hardly judge.

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This article has 5 comments.


Felicia GOLD said...
on Jul. 23 2010 at 8:57 pm
Felicia GOLD, Chandler, Arizona
18 articles 0 photos 63 comments

yes i really like it

sad poems show a lot more than happy poems ever could


on Jul. 20 2010 at 9:50 pm
Meganchristine BRONZE, Millville, New Jersey
4 articles 0 photos 48 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You can do no wrong in the eyes of a follower"

“To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream; not only plan, but also believe.”

This is really sad. And I can't help but think This is how I used to feel, So hopeless. It's a good poem it just adds very little hope. This is just my opinion though. When I was like this I really didn't expect anything to happen to me. I was just empty. completely and instead of "finding" or "filling" I created a new person. I do like this though.

on Jul. 20 2010 at 8:55 pm
PeaveLoveMe SILVER, Deland, Florida
7 articles 0 photos 65 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I shall never give up, make believe is too much fun."

this is amazing! I love it!

Swiwi17 SILVER said...
on Jul. 20 2010 at 5:39 pm
Swiwi17 SILVER, Glasscity, Nevada
8 articles 0 photos 29 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Nothing ever promised tomorrow today"

Yeah well whenever I feel upset, writing things like this is all I can do to keep from doing so myself.

I'll assume that means you like?


Felicia GOLD said...
on Jul. 20 2010 at 4:08 pm
Felicia GOLD, Chandler, Arizona
18 articles 0 photos 63 comments
i almost got teary


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