Life is an ongoing war
You never seem to win, but you never seem to loose
My life is for
Anyone and anything
To live and to learn
To see and to ignore
To forgive and forget
but how can I forgive// when I can’t forget
the box of memories hidden beneath my lies
with the artificial pictures that I can’t seem to shake
only My Memory Box holds the truths of my childhood
the good and the bad
the heart aching and heart filling
and the sorrow less pain
why must the cover stay closed
well, the crack of light escaping from the box
burns my eyes// sooths my soul// and caresses me with wind
as my blood filled heart pumps through my chest and knocks the cover right from under my nose
But what within the blue covered box
Well……
The never ending book filled with words of stale happiness and the sketching of my fairy tale dream
The books in which I learned to write these words
Pictures of my childhood- the simpler days
In which I yet to see in the future
It seem back then, the only thing that would make me smile is potato chips
As my hips sway right and left as my independence grows stronger
The ink seems to wash away with every tear that falls from my face
The appears from my diary seem to burn away with every smile I make
As the fake laughter turn real
As I look at my family pictures
To the ones who have died, the ones who have lived, and the ones in between
I forgot out about teddy my best and only friend for 8 years
My little cradle, that I used to crawl of every night
It was my prison
My stuffed animals, the ones who I used to sleep with every night to scare away the monsters and fill my head with pleasant dreams
My life
My eternity
My first steps
My first smile
My first tear
My first word
M first school- which I hoped to be my last….but unfortunately…..was not
My first dollar
My first friend
My first fight with my parents
My first fight with my friend
My first party
My first….
Oh god…..
My first heartbreak
I was hoping I wouldn’t have to do this
To remaniss on the fatal feelings
Does it stay with my forever, in my memory box, I thought this was for happiness
But maybe I was wrong
Like how I thought darkness was to happiness
And light was to danger
Maybe…..I should keep it
To help me with my future mistakes
as this was a big mistake
I smile even though this resulted in pain
The feelings of love can never go stale
Like my first taste of rotten milk
Ewww!!
I close the lid, this is the end, but also a beginning
Of new memories to come
The good and the bad
To live and to learn
To see and to never ignore
To forgive and to forget
New memories pilling up like mountins
Maybe I’ll need a new memory box
My life
My eternity
My everything