The depression grows greater. The oxygen i breathe seems to start choking me. My stomach feels funny,my heart slides lower and lower down my sleeve is about to hit the ground and shatter.The walls look like they're about to cave in. Loneliness and pain creep up on me and stealthily attack me. unbareable flashbacks occur.All of this happens at 4:19pm. The tears i held back begin to well up and spill over and stream silently down my cheeks. His words begin to choke me and within seconds I'm gasping for air. The sky gets darker and the last of the sun and my happiness disapears for the night. The misery and pain becomes too unbareable and the hours of pain pass by agonizingly slowly and by 8:30 I'm laying on my bed with my face in a pillow muffleing my screams of terror and agony. After all the screams stop the tears start up again and stream relentlessly down my cheeks;as the pain fades and my breathing returns to normal, i dread tomarrow because all of this happens at 4:19 pm.
January 31, 2010