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Our Mistake

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I never expected perfect
But I never expected this.
I was under your spell,
Wher every look said:
Marry me!
Every smile:
Have my babies.
It's over now,
and I finally see our mistake.

Contrary, to your belief,
Our mistake was not breaking up
It was getting together.
we're the perfect human example
Of oil and water,
Impossible for us to mix,
For us to be,
Anything other then a heart breaking mistake.



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This article has 11 comments. Post your own now!

GypsyRose said...
Aug. 8, 2010 at 8:51 pm

sounds like me and my ex, only...we still won't give up, even thought he's going off to college 3 hours away.

Overall i loved it, it got the message across. check spelling before you post, the where in line 4 is missing the E, happen though. I thought the lin "Have my babies" was a little disconnected, but i ssee where you were coming from, mostly out of experience.

The last stanza really got my attention.I think it was well delivered. Very nice writing.

 
josiebelle replied...
Aug. 12, 2010 at 10:36 am
thanks for taking the time to read and iv always been bad all through school for not checking my spellings!!
 
jonas_chic899 said...
Apr. 13, 2010 at 11:14 am
hm that was short, but i still liked it. good poem:)
 
josiebelle replied...
Apr. 13, 2010 at 11:44 am

its about quality not quantity!lol

thanks for reading!!!!

 
jonas_chic899 replied...
Apr. 13, 2010 at 12:02 pm
lol i kno, i just wanted it to be longer cuz i liked wat i was reading:)
 
josiebelle replied...
Apr. 13, 2010 at 3:04 pm
haha thanks good to know im doing something right!!
 
elfiewrites said...
Apr. 7, 2010 at 8:21 pm
I really liked this article! Keep on writing. Please, if you get the chance, may you give me feedback on my work, too? Thanks so much, and great work.
 
ZAVERY said...
Apr. 3, 2010 at 8:25 pm
I really like this! Especially the image choice!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
josiebelle replied...
Apr. 11, 2010 at 6:13 am
thanks im into science so i thought id combine it with my poetry!!
 
BabyV replied...
May 22, 2010 at 9:50 am
Yea its really good, and very relatable
 
josiebelle replied...
May 27, 2010 at 3:39 am
mucho thanks for reading!!
 
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