the only one

December 14, 2009
A disconnect.
The undertone flaunts itself in my ear,
I can’t hear a voice.

Your eyes echo in my head.
I see them blinking at me and
The creases around your lips stretch
As you smile and my heart stops beating
For that flash,
For that perfect picture stained in my head.

I have been caught once again
On the train tracks in between two cities where they
Ran me out of town.
I am stuck,
Guilty as charged,
And I have nowhere left to go.
My home has turned into my prison,
And your heart that was once an escape
From my constant running,
Now is nothing but something I used to want.
I used to want you so bad,
You must have been something else.

In solitude I find peace,
I find loneliness,
I find rest from the angry souls
Who drive into mine in an effort to destroy the only reason I have left,
To drown it inside their misery.
I tried so hard to give you my breath even as I was gasping
In the undertow.

Tonight;

It is raining on the train tracks and
There are no whistles blowing.
There are no others looking for a free ride or
A place to hide.
I am the only one.

I am the only one.

I am the only one and
You were supposed to be here too.
You were supposed to meet me here so we
Could find our place out of town,
Out of cities and commercialism
And hypocrisy and ignorance
And screams and cries and
Blows to the face and
Slaps to the wrists and
I can’t cry anymore.
I can’t cry because I know we won’t escape this.
I must accept my fate on the tracks,
I must accept my abandonment as the reason for my
Suicide.
I must accept my detachment as the reason
You never tried.

You never tried,
On the tracks I wait.

The only one.





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