Flowers in my Fall, Sunshine in my Night

September 19, 2009
By MariaMenendez GOLD, Brooklyn, New York
MariaMenendez GOLD, Brooklyn, New York
11 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Flowers in my fall
Sunshine in my night
I believed was what you were
Until it all went off right

We’re crashing and burning
Sinking and drowning
No such thing as friendship between us
Because you’re pushing me away
You don’t ever smile anymore
At least not my way

I’m not asking for love
Not asking for forgiveness
To me this is strictly just business
Don’t leave me tonight and come back to me tomorrow
Because you're the one leaving me in pain and sorrow
In guilt and in fault
Leaving me feeling like a book with no cover
As if in the future, like a car with no hover

Never said I stopped loving you
Never said I didn’t care
But you're losing yourself
Something to watch, I cannot bear
So why do you ignore me, if you say you love me?
Why do you leave me in pain if you say without me you’d go insane?
Why do you act as if you don’t care if all we ever did was our affection share?
Why leave me in tears with broken dreams, instead of choosing me and playing on the same teams?

Never said I stopped loving you
And yes, neither did you
So then why distict me
When all I ever did was love you?
Care for you?
Want and need you?
Even desire you?

Yes, I'm feeling sad and blue
But I'm not blaming it on you
Because not being able to forget your love is my fault
My doing or undoing
Like taking a jump in the Olympics but missing the vault
I'm slamming face first into the ground with nothing to catch me
To save me
To hold me
To kiss and caress me

How is it possible to still feel such emotions if this relation ship has had no motion?
No collaboration?
No expectations?
Lost all its limitations?

Yet nothing stands in my way
No wall, border, fence, or gate
From reaching you
Touching you
Feeling you
Nothing stands in my way

Nothing except you
Calling me over just to knock me back
Making me feel like I'm the one holding the lack
Or the want
The desire
That of which is setting my soul on fire

But you're raining on me
Thunder and all
Making my days dark and my night hell
You're a completely different person
Collaborating yourself into a shell
Running away from what I know you want to keep
Because of that heartfelt feeling so deep

But all in all experience is needed
And for my future I am now seeded
Ready for what to expect in a man
A guy
A boy
A jerk

That’s what you are
A jerk
One with no feeling
With no ability to be sentimental, kind, or caring
Worrying not even for yourself or at least trying

You upset me
You stress me
But you’ve also empowered me
You opened my eyes
And now I thank you
Because never will I again fall for a fool
One like you
With nothing to portray but the fact you're life is over before it even started

You're not a baby
But you act like one
You're not an adult
Yet you want to be treated like one
For what reasons?
When you don’t act like one
Think like one
Maybe even deserve to be one?

Flowers in my fall
Sunshine in my night
You lit a fire in my garden
Now everything’s destroyed
You placed a cloud above my head
Now everything is void

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This article has 11 comments.

Emily :) said...
on Oct. 3 2009 at 11:35 pm
lol, it's okay, you sound like you're sorry! >< but i think it's actually really good, and don't feel bad about it. If it's what flows, then so be it. It's fine as far as I'm concerned, but i just can't help picking at the minute things that i see if they aren't grammatically or poetically perfect. blame the perfectionist. :P Definitely let what comes out come. it's better than not having anything come out.

on Oct. 2 2009 at 5:13 pm
MariaMenendez GOLD, Brooklyn, New York
11 articles 0 photos 4 comments
thanx guys <3

on Oct. 2 2009 at 5:08 pm
MariaMenendez GOLD, Brooklyn, New York
11 articles 0 photos 4 comments
lol yes i am :)

on Oct. 2 2009 at 3:50 pm
MariaMenendez GOLD, Brooklyn, New York
11 articles 0 photos 4 comments
thanx Emily, and yea i did had a few mistakes lol didnt proof check it too well b4 i posted it, like in stanza 5 line 3 the word is supposed to be distinct not distict, and some where in the poem theres a you're thats suppssed to be a your, but i couldnt find it and yea ur right, my rhymes arent oh so great lol its because i was just righting really fast, and i was madd at the time, what came out came out, i was kind of free styling like a rapper lol :) but with my pen instead of my mouth lol and again thank you very much :)

santi said...
on Sep. 29 2009 at 9:31 pm
never new my cause had in her for poetry ^_^ nice poem

on Sep. 29 2009 at 8:29 pm
aww maria this was realy good i love it; all your poems and quptes are always so great =] ily & i miss you babeeeeee

Emily :) said...
on Sep. 29 2009 at 8:17 pm
Wow! from recalling you from elementary school (no offense) but i didn't know you had it in you! Definitely winning worth, which is why you evidently won. You're a really amazing poet, and I can only wish to be like you, because truth be told, I suck at writing poetry.... ><

Umm, don't mind me? but I though I'd point out to you a bit of constructive criticism? uhhh, a couple of your rhymes sound a bit forced, I know you don't have a rhyme scheme or anything, be maybe you can look into that for future revisions if you feel the need to; and I also think that a few words here and there could be replaced with others or you could rephrase some things, but they're all REALLY minor things. You're an amazing writer, and I can only be jealous and hope that one day, I'll get to where you are. :]

MinaLove said...
on Sep. 29 2009 at 3:38 pm
Really good. You deserve to win =)

It is evident that you are a true poet <3

xsagadude said...
on Sep. 29 2009 at 6:31 am
Really good

Great said...
on Sep. 28 2009 at 10:21 pm
This is extraordinary i loved it

on Sep. 28 2009 at 10:19 pm
this is really good. keep up the great work (:



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