I watch the lines of my life come together and apart. I sink into nothingness, what am I? Who am I, here? I am floating above everything. I feel cold. And dark. I Asked for a rope, pull me in. I wish I could find my way back to Calm. To Collected. But these feelings, they run rampart; everywhere and nowhere. I wish I could have arms so long I could wrap them around Before, I want to stop this train, jump off, tell the driver to slow down. Please, just slow down. Why are we speeding by it all? Let’s sit in the garden, let’s have a picnic and talk about yesterday. Let’s talk about tomorrow, where is now? Lost. A blur. Where is now? I miss the days of blissful nothing. My thoughts were sunflowers, facing the incandescent sun. My thoughts are intrusive weeds, growing unwanted. Let’s tear them down. Let’s fix this. I want Back. I want Before. Slow down.
about growing up
September 3, 2009