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Jerk This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.

I love your voice,
your soft brown hair.
I love your eyes
and love your stare.

I love your laugh,
your cocky smirk,
your stupid jokes.
You precious jerk,

you know I do.
I want my hands
all through your hair
each treasured strand.

I’m wrapped around
your finger still.
Am I yet yours?
Your love does kill

the things I hold
so close to me
and yet you’re the
best jerk I see.

This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.




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YurFutureAuthor68 said...
Jan. 31, 2012 at 2:29 pm:
Pretty good. I like it mostly because of the picture 'cuz i love my cowboys ;) but it rhymed some of the time and then kind of faded away, I really like the concept and can tell that you put yourself into the writing, very good just make sure that its not the stereotypical poem about that boy that broke my heart kind of thing. Its very good though. You can tell that this poem is personal so just be careful that people MAY critique negatively, but to me once again, it is pretty good, but I love t... (more »)
 
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thewords This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jan. 31, 2012 at 2:07 pm:
dopeeeee .
 
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waLKinHEartACHE said...
Jan. 31, 2012 at 12:58 pm:
i shows what you like while all the same time telling him that he is a jerk. I really enjoyed it.
 
loverofroses replied...
Jan. 31, 2012 at 2:24 pm :
i know right! i loved how the words flowed fantastically without rhyming to excess and such
 
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VampiresEverywhereGirl said...
Jan. 31, 2012 at 10:44 am:
Its pretty good, I can understand the perspective of it all. REALLY AWESOME!!!!
 
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Sweetie2toCute said...
Jan. 31, 2012 at 10:40 am:
I Like This Alot. It Made Me Smile. Its Touching.
 
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sHEbeLIEveD said...
Jan. 31, 2012 at 9:03 am:
This was good. Like Cjjeanne said, a little choppy. You need to work on your flow a little but otherwise, this is really good.
 
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Cjjeanne said...
Jan. 31, 2012 at 8:38 am:
I'll admit that it is a little choppy but I do really like it. Maybe go back and see what you can add to make it better.
 
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yesenia68 said...
Jan. 30, 2012 at 6:04 pm:
I like it(:
 
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BlameJuliet said...
Jan. 28, 2012 at 2:51 am:
This is good, but it seems a little...juvenile? However it is short, sweet and to the point.
 
Sassychix234 replied...
Jan. 31, 2012 at 8:56 am :
I agree with this. It has a good theme in it, but the way you exicuted the theme made me want to re-read it to make sure I didn't miss anything. Maybe go back and figure out what you could do/add to make it better.
 
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AngRodrig This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jan. 27, 2012 at 4:30 pm:
Story of my life! I think you did a great job
 
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writerfreak21231This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Jan. 31, 2012 at 3:46 pm:
Don't be a jerk! ha ha! :)(:
 
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writerfreak21231This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Jan. 31, 2012 at 3:50 pm:
oh! and if you hated it so much, why even bother to comment on it? If anything your comment doesn't make sense! :)(:
 
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countrygirl said...
Jan. 25, 2012 at 10:28 am:
I really love this one reminds me of my ex-boyfriend.
 
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Photographywonder said...
Jan. 24, 2012 at 10:23 am:
great job! I really love it! it's sad so many people are jerks these days.
 
killa bouy swag replied...
Jan. 25, 2012 at 9:50 am :
can you stop crying and get a life bro.u stupid
 
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BlueLillyThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Jan. 19, 2012 at 9:47 am:
Wow I Love It!! Makes me think of past guys I know.
 
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ninjanessie said...
Jan. 18, 2012 at 1:16 pm:
AWESOME! It is great! thought it reminds me of a jerk i know...... :) made my day
 
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EPluribusUnumThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jan. 16, 2012 at 7:50 pm:
I love this, it's easy for anyone to relate to and it's very well put. Bravo!
 
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