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You Can Go

You can go,
Back to someplace you belong
Because it is not now with me and mom
Its not here where you must take responsibility
For your children that your expect to care for so deeply
So don’t struggle to pretend
That you’re beyond doubt my friend
That you in fact want me
And that you haven’t quite yet forgot me
But how is that true?
Where are all the “I love yous'” I deeply cherished
Have your feelings for me completely perished?
Where are all the birthday cards you still owe?
Where did every the phone calls go?
Why don’t you long for me like I do for you?
What can I do to get the love support from you?
Did I do something wrong?
I just don’t understand
All I want you to do is to grasp my hand
And tell me you love me once again
Because this feeling I can barley stand
You were suppose to be here just like everybody else
Not just leave me all by myself
Not just leave me to hurt and cry
Sometimes without you I would much rather die
Don’t try to pretend you’ll always be there
That you really love me that you in actuality care
Because all the evidence is already there
All the evidence is by now in place
And the reality of it is like a smack in the face
That even though you’re mean I secretly love it
That even though you tease me and pull my hair
I secretly cherish the moments that you were there
Even though you hit me and leave me scars
I always have hope that someday I'll touch your heart
Even though you describe me in awful ways
That maybe you’ll love me someday
And maybe if you gave me that attention I need
Everything would be okay
Everything would be like it’s supposed to be
With you and me
But it could never be

You can go
I wouldn’t mind
Because your affection I know I will never find
I would hardly miss you
But that’s a lie
Because I think about it everyday as life passes by
I think about it every night
And when I fall asleep, you were the last one on my mind
I always thought this feeling would fade
But it seems like it will never to go away
Because no matter how much I deny
You’ll always be apart of what’s inside
Because what could have been, would have been
If given the chance
Maybe I would seem happy
At first glance
It makes me sad
How I must call you my dad
You can go now
I'll be glad



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