just like a shellfish

January 9, 2011
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i keep telling myself, that other people have it worse.
and me, being my selfish self, doesnt believe it.
how can i be miserable like this,
how can i be at my lowest point,
when i want to die,
and still have time to think about someone else?
sometimes i have to care about myself.
but i dont.
i dont know how to.
no one has ever cared enough about me to realize
that the smile is really a frown.
the glossy eyes are from my tears.
that i cover my face when i laugh because im crying.
no one has ever cared enough about me to sit me down,
and ask about my family.
how my mom is,
how my brother is.
how my dog is.
how i am.
whats going on with my problems?
do i need help with anything?
im too busy doing things for other people.
no im not a good person.
but thats why no one wants to care about me.
im not changing.
i try though.
i do try.

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