Sing in me, Muse, and through me tell the story

Of the hero unexpected and bold

When his fear grew, undiminishing

A worthy enemy, fiery filled tabasco

A simple chance to prove worth

A dare set, lack of genitals questioned

Show no fear, fright or defeat

Stare down the devilish terror tabasco

Prepare the spoon, prepare the test

The unprepared hero began his tasting journey

Sing, Muse, of the Hero’s quick defeat

The water could not penetrate such a beast

Up came the cruel fear (and the Hero’s milkshake)

Safely confined in a forever tainted cup

Dignity never regained, but God status attained