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Ringleader
All your words are cut into my skin
Line after line
Every damn word is there,
There for only me to see.
You think you know me,
That all my secrets are now your’s,
But dear, don’t you remember
That I am the crazy one here?
All the while you think,
Oh you think
You’re the one destroying me,
Tearing down my walls
And burning my heart to ash.
But you are blind.
I am the ringleader of this f***ed up circus,
I make the lions jump through the burning hoops,
The clowns act like buffoons because I wish them to,
The crowd roars with delight at the performance I orchestrated,
Not you.
I am the one
That makes razors dance upon my skin,
Like ballerinas binged out on meth.
Pills fall from both my hands
Like angels cast out from Heaven
Making their fiery descent into Hell.
I am the master of my fate,
The captain of this ship:
And love,
I’ll be the one to walk the plank
To fall into a sea filled with regret.
You can’t stop me
No one can.
I am a train on the path
Toward derailment,
There’s no stopping what has been started.
You fooled yourself into thinking
That you were the lion,
And I the lamb.
But now you know which one of us
Can really roar.
And I will die
As the ringleader,
The drugged out ballerina,
The angel with burning wings cast down to Hell.
I will die as a mighty captain,
And with my last breath you will hear my final roar.
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I wrote this after I read the book Heartless.