Remembering to Forget

October 4, 2008
By Anonymous

oh but love;
im tired of pretending.
pretending i dont care.
pretending it doesnt hurt.
pretending that i dont hate him
pretending that i do hate him

allowing myself to want to be his friend,
after all the sadness he put me through

watching you two together
the best friend with the ex boyfriend.
hurts my heart and soul.
happy for you? or mad at you?
i can only be happy, but the hurt i feel
as i watch him never seem to care;
telling you he does.
giving me his false grief.
,his lies, his immaturity...
it hurts how love blinds you
from seeing how much it truly hurts.
yet i know by saying that, it hurts you too...
im sorry love.

you love both of us; you say you support us both.
but why do you call me immature?
when i never said anything snide...

im tired of remembering all the time;
of the things he used to say,
and the things he says to me now.
he told me he loved me.
next day he told me he hated me.
now he says he loves you;
and i pray he says is true.
for if he was to break you,
then there would be two broken
souls;best friends, by the same boy.

im sorry if i seem jealous;
im sorry if i seem hurt;
im just glass, breakable.
im constantly remembering
everything in my head.
its time i move on.

im remembering to forget.
im sick and tired.i want to break free.
but its so hard.but i will. i am.
im remembering to forget.

The author's comments:
Dedicated to my best friend;
and her new boyfriend;
my ex-boyfriend.

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