A New Year To Come?

January 15, 2009
At this time my head is like a ghost town, disappointing and leery,
Knowing there comes another year, and reliving the hell makes me weary
Not sure I can go on to more years
While I’m still battling my biggest fears
My uneasy heart is weighed down with secrets and guilt
Bringing my head down in shame as my posture does wilt
Tears brought to my sad eyes as my soul is bought at the smallest price
How much the cost of my happiness is, turns my heart to ice
Everyday I wear my heart on my sleeve
For all to use, but after most leave
How am I to go on knowing the struggles I am to face?
I can’t take things one at a time, I have to pick up the pace
For with the losses of this past year, all my hopes migrated west
While in the ground my faith and dreams for now rest
Right next to my hero, six feet under
With the memories of the rain and thunder
I lost my high goals
As I set all my self-discipline rules
Ever since the start of this living hell
I knew nothing would ever again be well
And in living with the weight of the world on your shoulders,
You know you can’t take on your friend’s, but you think just hers
Soon one thing leads to another
And under all these worlds you smother
Holding everything inside will cause the soul to explode
That’s the price of caring and putting more on your load
But now I’m drowning in this pool of lost dreams
Realizing not everything is what it seems.

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