My Life, My love, but most important my best friend.....GONE

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Cant stop thinking
cant stop wondering what if.
why didn't it work?
was it something i did?
something i said?
we'll never know!
i lost him for good and i want him back in my life for good!
it's not the same.
can't seem to be as happy as i use to be.
he was my smile, my life and most important my BEST FRIEND!
now im just simple Jana.
i use to be happy Jana.
things changed and i can't seem to get through it easy.
he was my 1st love and always will be!
nothing can ever change that.
he was the light to my day.
not once did u see me not smile around him.
i cared for him more then i did my own life.
yea i know i lost him forever
but all i want him to know is that i will NEVER forget him
and i will always care and love him and i just him back in my life.
i cant seem to live everyday like the way i use to.
its not the same.
i dont smile as much.
i cry all the time..
and now hes gone!!
so why cant i get over him and be happy?
because you cant get over someone you really and truely love.
its not a crush its the real thing!
all i can think is what if.
im just in love.
i miss him badley.
seems like my hearts bleeding!
I just cant take the pain.
i just want my best friend back!
i love you more than anything!
i try everyday to get through this and it just keeps getting harder. your always on my mind! what can i do?
your all i think about and dream about!
you were my 1st and i wanted you to be my last!!
but now thats over and done with! your out of my life completly! and honestly i dont know what to do with myself.
when i see you in the hallways i just glance at you and remember how it use to be!
when i hear certain songs on the radio it reminds me of us talking on the phone.
and if i had one wish and just ONE WISH it would be to have you back in my life forever! why just one wish..because if i had you back in my life ill be happy and dont need any other wishes.
ill have everything i need to make me happy!
you were my heart, my life and most important my best friend!
forever my love will be for you!!





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