Reality Check

November 29, 2008
What if I wanted to break away from society?
A culture
Where war replaces peace
Where money replaces love
Where emotions run dry
Where coping with it doesn't apply
Is this the kind of community we want to live in?
Would you stop me from leaving?-- Can you blame me for cheating?
My way out
Of life.
Out of School. Out of Love. Out of Pain.
Out of this
Repulsive palce
I live in
Where being a terrorist is as easy as
Having brown skin
Is this what we want to live in?
A corrupt place where rules are
Pushed aside
Where solving problems are resolved
With homocide..
Don't blame me for breaking away
Where there is a place hatred won't go anyway
Love has meaning and is not
By something green
Where peace reins
Over war
Where emotions rise
Above more than just words that are said
Now put these ideas inside your head
Tell me what you think now
Because if you don't think differently somehow
Then there is no hope for the future and the now!

Join the Discussion

This article has 141 comments. Post your own now!

miss.bliss1 said...
Dec. 28, 2008 at 9:51 pm
TAKE ME WITH YOU!...... You R a great writer! Keep writeing!
LivingInLiterature said...
Dec. 28, 2008 at 3:11 am
I understand the world is not perfect, but the way the poem talks about running away from life makes it sound suicidal. Suicide is not the answer to anything, nor will it ever be. You can't run away from life or problems. Its never too late to change things for the better, and this poem sounds a bit depressed. I personally prefer a more optimistic view on the world and its flaws.
LydiaW said...
Dec. 28, 2008 at 2:24 am
This is possibly the best poem I have read on this site. This is could be worthy of big-time publication. Write on!
kmc24 said...
Dec. 27, 2008 at 5:35 am
Wow. I find it extremely interesting how people are interpeting this poem. It is a bit confusing but hey that's why we re-draft right? I believe this poem is great and with some minor revisions, it'll be superb.(: But I honestly feel that you did a great job on it. I understand the message your are trying to share with us reader and know that you're not a pessimist. I entirely agree with your view. But for others, it might be hard to decipher so as I stated earlier, make a few revisions and this... (more »)
XxItaliianBiishhXDxX said...
Dec. 26, 2008 at 5:35 am
I definitly enjoyed this poem... u are a great writer and I mean that for surw thanksz for such a great write =] <3
Nick said...
Dec. 25, 2008 at 10:10 am
WOW This article's been best-rated in like forever, and folks are sooooo right to do so!!! Victoria, you must be Awesomeness! =)
parthenonprincess said...
Dec. 25, 2008 at 7:12 am
All I have to say is: If your poem is generating this much discussion, (whether positive or negative) it must be at least profound enough to invoke all this thought. Keep writing.
ebony_is_beautiful_1 said...
Dec. 25, 2008 at 4:05 am
This one was strong, but I would suggest that next time, you try not to use so many cliches. You have promise if you can step away from the "pain" and "war" and "love" and "peace" stuff. I am looking forward to reading more from you.
Forky said...
Dec. 24, 2008 at 7:31 pm
Though provoking, yet slightly distrubing.
To me, it sounds as if someone who has committed suicide is writing it from Heaven.
It presents a very true concept, however, that few people seem to grasp.
I would suggest reading the book Feed by M.T. Anderson. You would value its message about America
xXPoetryFreakXx said...
Dec. 23, 2008 at 9:35 pm
Um...I inturpreted this poem differently. I have read a lot of poems, but this one stood out. As you stated, many people have different opinions, but we also have different outlooks.
I have dealt with many problems and have dealt with them by writing, but I haven't exactly wrote a peice like this.
When I read the poem, it pretty much said to me, "Give up!" It sounds like we need to cheat our way out, and escape (as in 'go emo and kill yourself' kind of thing). Maybe I re... (more »)
audrey said...
Dec. 23, 2008 at 5:25 pm
obviously all these ignorant people just want to look at the things that could be wrong with this amazing poem, and are oblivious to the wonderful message it has.
passionthroughpeace said...
Dec. 23, 2008 at 1:07 am
I loved your poem. It really made me think about the world that we as teenagers are getting ready to enter. im not sure if i interpreted it correctly, but i can understand the feeling of wanting to "break away". It is our generation that is stuck to deal with the problems in society and at times it can be a bit stressful. I hope that you continue to write. Please dont let negative comments put you down. You are a great inspiration to this generation.
MyonlySecret said...
Dec. 23, 2008 at 12:37 am
Honestly, i agree with you. I don't think you're negative, i understand your point of view.I think like you
mollie said...
Dec. 22, 2008 at 12:49 am
reading this poem, i think it is a strong message that our world needs to change. it is obviously not personal, but it has a strong meaning, and I admire that. Vicky, you should keep writing poetry, you are awesome. Love this poem.
Devin said...
Dec. 19, 2008 at 3:10 am
Since when is poetry supposed to be happy and fluffy and reasonable and optimistic? Poetry is a raw and visceral art form, a way to express one's deepest feelings. To comment on the tone of the poem is to comment on the feelings the author had at the time. Keep that in mind. Without knowing the author, even with knowing her, you cannot say her feelings are unwarranted.
crich897 said...
Dec. 18, 2008 at 11:04 pm
You know, I believe that it is the total and complete ignorance that our world and schools are filled with today that has absolutely destroyed creative expression itself.
One example: JUSTIN! Look at the comment that he left. He says this:
"My mummy said that she doesn't want me to hang out with someone like Victoria/Vicky. She said that she does not want me to get the idea to break away this "repulsive place where having a brown skin is like being a terrorist." ... (more »)
sunnysmiles17 said...
Dec. 29, 2008 at 6:52 pm
i abosolutly love this poem! i think the picture it paints it absolutly true! we do not live in a perfect world. and i think everyone at one point or another wants to breakaway. i love this poem. definetly now one of my favorites. :) keep writing because you rock.
goodnessgracious said...
Dec. 18, 2008 at 4:31 am
this is marvelous! i love it! i also love how you talk of change. it is wonderful that you want to make a change and are dedicated to seeing it through. dont ever stop. because there will be those who want to push you down bt u cant ever stop. you want a change in this world then u make one. we all need a change. i just wish more of us were as brave as you to admit it and work for it.
BlueGumFTW said...
Dec. 30, 2008 at 4:12 am
You are Awesome.
TheAuthor said...
Dec. 30, 2008 at 6:30 pm
Hey everybody,
I just want to say thanks for commenting my poem, it helps a lot with my writing. I would edit this piece, but I don't really know how to edit it(?) Haha, no buttons or anything to try to edit it.

To Chad: Yes, it would be fine if you used that line, it would be an honor for you to use it =P

Don't take all the words in the poem is literally. It does seem to have become personal now..?

Also, tone of the poem. I agree with one comment th... (more »)
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