November 21, 2008
Whether it be a pink rose, or a red rose, they never match her complexion
It doesn’t alter the gorgeousness; the petals point me in direction

To her lips, where I lay my eyes upon next,
It seems even her lips are beauty obsessed

A perfect dress for her teeth they serve
she becomes lovelier with every spoken word

Her bright smile, visible to a blind man
has brought me to the limit of what I can withstand

I now close my eyes, and the rush approaches my lips,
forever will I hold, our first precious kiss.

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savetheearth1031 said...
Dec. 3, 2008 at 3:32 am
this is a really vivid and descriptive poem...good work!! :) however, the 'proofreader' in me would say that the word "Gorgeousness" sounds awkward and messes up the rhythm of the poem. i'd choose a different word.
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